Saturday, May 11, 2013

I love being a MOM!!!

Photo credit:  my brother, Brian Wagner,
on  his ride home from evening
Mother's Day celebration 
Being a mom is the greatest experience, and most challenging, of my life.  It has also been the most rewarding.

Some people choose not to have children, and that is perfectly okay.  For me, it was without question something I wanted and needed to do.  I wanted so much to have a child who I could inspire, encourage, mold and grow. And, most especially, I wanted to feel a love like no other.

This is all very true of parenthood.

Thinking back to the full year that I was nursing Sarah, is a time I will never forget and memories I will cherish forever. I can say that now of course as the first month was incredibly difficult and I wanted to give up due to pain and breast infections. However, with help from a lactation consultant, support from my mommy friends, and patience, Sarah and I found our groove. It proved to be an incredibly special time bonding with my daughter.  It also forced me to sit down long enough to just stare at her, soak it all it, and wish the world for her.

Thinking of Sarah's first words, learning to walk, and inevitably running, understanding numbers, colors and shapes, and doing her first cartwheel, among so many other things brings me great joy and happiness. While I would have loved to have done it again with another child, it just was not in the cards.  I am thankful everyday for my daughter who is my blessing.  I live life vicariously through her and join her in her many journeys until she decides to go at it on her own.  I will always be her biggest cheerleader and support her in her future endeavors.  

It's amazing to watch a child try new things and experience new experiences for the first time, with reckless abandon and then see them grow and develop even further. Seeing Sarah play soccer, for example, is incredible to witness as she has learned a great deal and how to own the ball and commands a presence on the field.  It's even great fun to share in these situations with a child feeling like we as adults are reliving them for the first time too from a different perspective.
Photo credit:  my brother, Brian Wagner,
on  his ride home from evening
Mother's Day celebration

While there are many days that my daughter drives me up a wall and refuses to listen there are many more days that are just plain beautiful, and not so much for the trips we take and the activities we do, but mostly because we are a family and we do a lot together.  We are a team.  We know how each of us ticks.  In fact, being just the three of us enables both Daniel and I to enjoy all of Sarah's activities together versus having to split up to manage other children.  One of the many silver linings to having one child.

Being a mom is indeed a love like no other.  My husband, of nearly 10 years knows that I love him very much.  Even though I have know him and loved him longer than our daughter has been alive the love I have for her is far and beyond. I would walk through fire for both of them, that is without question.

The world we live in is unfortunately filled with violence and hatred.  While I will continue to do everything I can to protect my daughter I also know that I can't keep her from life or live each day in fear.

I fully intend to continue to cherish each moment I have with my daughter and squeeze her as tight as she is willing to let me.  I will always love her even on days when I may not like her for things she may say or do. I will always support her even when it may take me time to process.

Motherhood is a blessing.  And, while I have only one child, I am still every much a mom as someone with more children.  I love fully with my heart wide open.

In the bible there is a phrase that always gets me..."The bible is a closed book until it is read with an open heart."  This is also true for parenting. You must be open-minded to the journey that lies ahead when raising children as there is no manual, and there are winding roads.  There are also rainbows and many sunshines. However, if you are not open to the unpredictable nature of parenting it will be nothing more than a chore instead of a fun, trying, loving, challenging and heartfelt experience.

To all the mothers out there and those who help care for others just like they are mothers, here are some special Haiku to celebrate you and your devotion and love to others.

Happy Mother's Day
Love and appreciation
For all that we do

Time with family
Celebrate time together
Being a mother

Moms around the world
Acknowledge, fuss over them
Celebrate their role

Being a mommy
Challenging and rewarding
Love all around us

M. O. M. M. Y
Love, hugs, appreciation
For all that they do

Have a wonderful Mother's Day.


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